26 year old hair loss sufferer Kayleigh Winter bravely appeared on TV’s TLC – Too Ugly For Love?
It’s a fear we all share, particularly if female hair loss sufferers, when no light-hearted claims can be made about it being a sign of how ‘ultra-feminine’ or ‘extra virile’ we are.. Women are simply not meant to lose their hair under any circumstances other than cancer, and then only temporarily. Society dictates it is our non-negotiable birthright to possess a crowning glory which never lets us down.
Kayleigh, a hair loss sufferer since Alopecia first struck at the age of 11, explained how hard it was to open up about her hair loss to potential boyfriends and how most would quickly make their excuses when they found out. Mortifying indeed to a young woman whose self-confidence is severely dented in the first place. Kayleigh has now been single for five years.
Granted it is terribly sad we live in such a shallow and looksist age where few people are prepared to look beneath the surface at attraction stage. However in this era of revealing all, I think there is still a place for the old-fashioned view. ie is it anyone else’s business if you have hair loss? What have you to gain by telling them? What have they to gain by knowing? How is it dishonest not to tell them if they are never likely to know anyway? Why on earth should you feel guilty about not telling them? You haven’t had an affair for goodness sake, just a problem you never deserved to have and which you have done your best to solve. No one sweats this angst over fake nails or breast enhancements, so why hair?
Perhaps you do need to confess if you rely on a wig which needs to be taken off at night and he is bound to find out, but there are better solutions out there now such as the invisible bonded systems of natural hair that Aspiration Hair specialise in. Ok, so your hairdressing bills will be higher than normal, but most clients find it worth it to look, feel and live completely normally otherwise. Plus they often get better jobs as a result, which helps with the expense.
Certainly no other solution restored my confidence as well as my hair. And no other solution gave me quite the choice that this one did about who did and didn’t know about my hair loss. And if they run their fingers through my hair and find a few micro knots, well that’s just my ‘extensions’ which society does permit!
As for Kayleigh, she may hot have found love by the end of the show, but she had certainly enjoyed a few dates with some nice people which boosted her confidence for trying again in the big bad world. Hopefully too Kayleigh has given courage to other hair loss sufferers to look for love and believe they have as much right to find happiness as anyone else.
As for a bit of feminine mystique, that’s our prerogative!